Stop Being Cheap (Part One)

Picture of a miser.

Don’t be cheap!

Stop being cheap. That’s an important life lesson that I had to learn that has tremendously improved my life. It’s something that I believe that many other people probably need to learn too.

I believe that being cheap can block your blessings. And not only that but, I also believe that it can cause mental trauma, self-esteem issues and a miser’s mentality.

What!!!”, you may be saying to yourself. “All of that?”

Yes, and I’ll explain.

Words are powerful.

The Bible says that there is “life and death” in the power of the tongue.

Words have inspired people to build nations. Words have brought down nations. They have inspired people to reach for the highest heights of development. Words have motivated people to work for the betterment of society. And they have caused people to lay down their lives for principles in which they believed.

Words move us. They inspire us. They lead our minds down paths that can ultimately lead to success or failure.

And when a person is constantly infusing their mind with negative words the mind begins to outwardly manifest that negativity in the person’s life.

Now, what does that have to do with being cheap?

Okay, I’ll tell you. But first let me pose a few questions to you.

How would you feel if your child’s school sent home a note that said that they’d gotten a great deal on some CHEAP food and, would start serving it tomorrow for lunch?

What would you say to the doctor that told you right before your open heart surgery that he had saved you a few bucks on the heart valve that he was about to implant in you by buying a cheap one?

How would you feel if your close friends and family came up to you at the celebration of your biggest accomplishment and, said these things: “I got this cheap gift for you to show how much I care about you”, or “They had better gifts than this but this one was cheaper”, or “I think the world of you and I got you a cheap gift to show you”.

Now I know that some people will probably say, “But it’s the thought that counts”.

And I agree.

And in a way that saying proves my point.

What thoughts enter your mind when you hear the word “cheap”? Is it love? Thoughtfulness? Consideration? Abundance? Quality?

Probably not.

You probably think of “inferior”, “low-quality”, or “low value”.

A gift is a way of expressing appreciation.

Love and care can be a gift. And those things can’t be valued in terms of money.

When I use the word cheap, I’m not just talking about money. I’m talking about a mentality. Having a “cheap” mentality.

A mentality that is always looking for “cheap”, “cheaper”, or the “cheapest”. I’m also talking about word choice. And the power that words have in helping to chart the direction of our lives.

I believe that when we continually focus on “cheap”, we will eventually come to believe that “cheap” is our worth.

We start believing that inferior, low-quality, and low value is all that we deserve. We accept those things as how life is suppose to be. And it’s not.

We begin to accept those traits in our relationships and our daily lives. We settle.

Now I totally understand the economic climate that we live. Times can be hard and we should try to be wise and faithful stewards of our resources. Every dollar that we earn or receive should be valued and appreciated. I believe that we should always try and find ways to get the most out of our money.

I enjoy finding a good “bargain”. (Notice my word choice.) I like finding a good sale on something that I need at a price lower than I expected to pay. It’s okay to be frugal.

I believe that the damage happens when we become obsessive about it. When we focus on “cheap” instead of focusing on “getting the best value”, or “saving money”.

And here’s a quick thought:

When people say that they saved money because they bought “cheap”, do they take that money and put it in a savings or investment account where it can REALLY provide them with more value? Or do they use it to buy more “cheap”?

Being cheap can damage our minds because it can reinforce the belief that things are never worth the cost that we have to pay. And that’s just not true.

And having a cheap mentality can be especially harmful to entrepreneurs because we get back from the world what we put out. And if the only thing that you send out is, “cheap, cheaper, or cheapest”, then how will you feel when a person only wants the same in exchange for your product or service?

What will you say when a person wants you to devalue your work to a level that they deem appropriate? Or wants you to give a discount on the time, energy, and hard work that you’ve invested in your offering.

It’s no fun. It’s disheartening. And it can be depressing.

In my opinion, being cheap is a quick way to becoming miserly.

It’s a form of selfishness because it’s focus can lead to hoarding. Picture that…a selfish miserly hoarder! Would YOU want to be that type of person? (A fist held tight can not receive.)

Finding a bargain can be fun. Saving money is great! Comparison shopping is wise. But being cheap is not always a good thing.

It’s okay to pay full price. It’s okay to sometimes spend a little extra. It’s okay to buy things based on their value to you without regard to their costs.

However, it’s not okay to be wasteful, foolish, or a spendthrift.

Now, after reading this you may think that it’s just a matter of words.

And you’d be right.

It is.

(Are you on Twitter? Let’s connect. Find me at @attractandkeep.)

 

Here’s a list of words that can be substituted for the word cheap:

Inexpensive, low-cost*, economical, modest, nominal.

*(Notice that even Walmart advertises itself as “the low-cost leader”.)

Renew! An Encouragement Post To Give You A Lift

Today is the sunrise of your life. (Photo: Christian Thiergan)

Today is the sunrise of your life. (Photo: Christian Thiergan)

This post is a renewal of sorts for me. It serves as the first post for the AttractandKeep.com relaunch. I’ve decided that in addition to relationship and dating topics, I’ll also be focusing on motivational and inspirational themes as well. I think we all need a little motivational and inspirational encouragement at times. I hope that this post will encourage you to step out and BE BOLD. Live your life with purpose. Pursue your goals and dreams, and be the best YOU that you can be. Read and be encouraged.

This is an encouragement post. My only purpose for this post is for it to encourage you and, hopefully, inspire you to be the best you that you can be. This can be the year that you finally start to make your breakthrough.

You can do it.

Decide to make this year one of the best that you’ve ever lived.

You want a loving romantic relationship?

Decide on what you want in that relationship and then develop in yourself the characteristics that would attract it.

You want to start your own business?

Pick one of your hobbies that you could turn into a business and then do it.

You want to improve your personal appearance or social life?

Write down what you want and then go after it and make it happen.

Right now, today, this very minute, is the best time for you to make a commitment to yourself to become the you that you always wanted to be.

It doesn’t matter what “they” think you can do, it only matters what YOU think (and then know) that you can do.

Don’t settle.

Don’t diminish yourself or your dreams.

I believe that there is a God that created each one of us for a specific purpose. Just think about how special and unique you are.

There is NO one that has ever lived, or will live, that will be EXACTLY like you.

And if God created a purpose specifically for you, then that means that your life has value. And there is something that the world needs that only you can provide.

I understand that we all get down in the dumps sometimes.

It happened to me the other day.

For some reason, I felt like I was living like a hamster running backwards on a treadmill. I felt discouraged because it often seems like I’m not achieving my goals and dreams fast enough.

Have you ever felt like that?

Have you ever got downright disgusted with yourself because you felt like you should be farther ahead than you are?

Have you ever wanted to go back in time and live life over? Go back and take advantage of all of the opportunities that you wasted.

Well, guess what.

You can’t.

And neither can I.

We’re stuck in the present.

But guess what. Although we can’t go back and change yesterday’s past, we can start creating tomorrow’s. And the way that we do that is by making the most of our present.

Tomorrow’s past is made up of the present.

Decide what you want to be and start being it.

Decide what you want to have and then make a plan and go get it.

Decide what you want to do in life and then do it.

You can have it. You can be it. You can make it happen.

You can change the course of your life by making a decision to change.

Just do it!

Your life will never be all that it can be unless you actively and, consciously make an effort to grow into more.

And once your decision is made to be your best, then make a simple plan of ways to become your best. It doesn’t have to be a long and complex one. Just a few lines on what steps that you can take to create the life that you want.

The next step would be to “just do it”.

Start with the simplest and easiest thing that you can do. Do that one thing.

And then move on.

And then move on to the next.

And then keep going until you build your momentum up to the point that you are being carried along by the force of your actions.

The way that I got out of my slump was to: 1) Acknowledge it, 2) tell myself that my time is coming, and 3) get back to work on my plan.

One of the best things that I believe that you can do to start the process of creating a better life for yourself is to become your own cheerleader.

Talk to yourself in a positive way.

Drown out your negative thoughts (and the negative opinions of others) by bombarding those thoughts with positive ones.

Tell yourself that your time is coming because it has to come. Tell yourself that success will be yours because you are willing to pay whatever price success is going to charge you. Tell yourself that no one is going to create your best life for you.

Get mad. Get excited. Get angry.

And then get busy!

And even if you feel like you are doing what you were destined to be, stretch yourself and see if you can be more.

Your best is waiting for you to come get it.

(Are you on Twitter? Let’s connect. Find me at @attractandkeep.)